Mary Dudley, Lady Sidney

Lady Mary Sidney (née Dudley; c. 1530–1535 – 9 August 1586) was a lady-in-waiting at the court of Elizabeth I, wife of Sir Henry Sidney and the mother of Sir Philip Sidney and Mary Sidney Herbert, Countess of Pembroke. She was daughter of John Dudley, Duke of Northumberland, and sister of Elizabeth's favourite, Robert Dudley, Earl of Leicester.

Although she was marginally implicated in her father's attempt to place Lady Jane Grey on the English throne and affected by his attainder, Mary Dudley was one of Queen Elizabeth's most intimate confidantes during the early years of her reign. Her duties included nursing the Queen through smallpox in 1562 and acting as her mouthpiece towards diplomats. She was the mother of seven children and accompanied her husband, Sir Henry Sidney, to Ireland and the Welsh Marches. From the 1570s the couple complained repeatedly about their, as they saw it, poor treatment at the Queen's hands. Still one of Elizabeth's favourite ladies, Mary Dudley retired from court life in 1579, suffering from ill health during her last years.

Family and early years of marriage Mary Dudley was the eldest daughter among the thirteen children of John Dudley, 1st Duke of Northumberland and his wife Jane Guildford. she was interested in alchemy, romances, and writing poetry.

On 29 March 1551 Mary Dudley married Henry Sidney at Esher, Surrey. Possibly a love match, the ceremony was repeated in public on 17 May 1551 at her parents' house Ely Place, London. he was knighted by the young King on the day his father-in-law, who headed the government, was raised to the dukedom of Northumberland.

In May 1553 Mary's second youngest brother, Guildford Dudley, was married to Edward's favourite cousin, Lady Jane Grey. According to Lady Jane it was Mary Dudley who, on 9 July 1553, called upon her to bring her to Syon House, the place where she was informed she was Queen of England according to King Edward's will. After Mary I's triumph within a fortnight and the arrest and execution of the Duke of Northumberland, the Sidneys were in a precarious situation. Like the rest of the Dudley family, Mary Dudley was attainted and suffered the consequences in her legal status. John Dudley, the eldest brother, died days after his release in October 1554 at Penshurst Place in Kent, the Sidneys' manor house granted to them by Edward VI in 1552. Philip Sidney, Mary Dudley's first child, was born there in November 1554 and named after his godfather, the King. His godmother, the widowed Duchess of Northumberland, died in January 1555. She left her daughter 200 marks as well as a cherished clock "that was the lord her father's, praying her to keep it as a jewel."

In 1556 Mary Dudley went with her husband to Ireland, where they resided mostly at Athlone Castle. Their first daughter, Mary Margaret, was born some time after their arrival. Queen Mary acted as godmother, but the child died at "one year and three quarters old". Meanwhile, the infant Philip stayed behind at Penshurst until his mother returned from Ireland in September 1558.

Serving Elizabeth I On Elizabeth I's accession in November 1558 Mary Dudley became a Gentlewoman of the Privy Chamber "without wages", an unsalaried position which left her dependent on her husband. In the 1559 negotiations over Archduke Charles, the Habsburg candidate for Elizabeth's hand, she acted as go-between for the Queen and her own brother in their dealings with the Spanish ambassador Álvaro de la Quadra and his Imperial colleague, Caspar von Brüner. Yet Elizabeth cooled down again and gave Mary Dudley further instructions to deal with the Spaniards, until she herself told de la Quadra "that someone had [spoken to him] with good intentions, but without any commission from her". Angry at her brother and the Queen, Mary Dudley felt betrayed.

In October 1562, Elizabeth became critically ill with smallpox; Mary Dudley nursed her until she contracted the illness herself, which according to her husband greatly disfigured her beauty. The Queen, who suffered only a little pocking, distanced herself from her once friend. That Mary took to wearing a mask afterwards is, however, a myth. Later in the year Sir Henry sent her back to England because of her ill health, which was apparently caused by the Queen's criticism of his lieutenantship:

The four Dudley siblings who survived into Elizabeth's reign, Mary, Ambrose, Robert, and their much younger sister Katherine, kept a close bond among themselves, while Henry Sidney and Robert Dudley had been friends since their common schooldays with Edward VI. Mary Dudley's third child Elizabeth was born at her brother Robert's house at Kew in late 1560. Until 1569 she had four more children, among them the future Countess of Pembroke and poet Mary Herbert, and Robert, who became the first Sidney Earl of Leicester. In 1573 an apothecary had supplied "oil of camenall and capers", syrups, and a box of marmalade for "Mistress Ambrocia."

Henry Sidney being once again in Ireland, The same castle was the scene of the great festival of 1575, at which the whole Sidney family were guests and Mary Dudley excelled in stag hunting. Her mother organized the wedding festivities at Wilton House. The expenses such a title implied were simply too great, Sir Henry's mind being "dismayed [by the] hard choice" between choosing financial ruin and royal displeasure "in refusing it". Two years later, in 1574, she quarrelled with the Lord Chamberlain (her brother-in-law, the Earl of Sussex) over accommodation at court. All in all though, she explained, "old Lord Harry and his old Moll" would accept "like good friends the small portion allotted our long service in court; which as little as it is, seems something too much." She joined her husband at Ludlow in 1582, where he was serving his third turn as President of the Council of Wales. A year later her health was in such a state that Henry Sidney believed he would soon have the opportunity to take a second wife. Mary Dudley died on 9 August 1586, three months after her husband, in whose elaborate funeral she had participated. She was buried by his side at Penshurst.

Issue Sir Philip Sidney (1554–1586); married Frances Walsingham in 1583 and had issue. Mary Margaret Sidney (died as a child) Elizabeth Sidney (died as a child) Mary Sidney (1561–1621); married Henry Herbert, 2nd Earl of Pembroke, in 1577 and had issue. Robert Sidney, 1st Earl of Leicester (1563–1626); married firstly Barbara Gamage and had issue. Married secondly Sarah Blount. Ambrosia Sidney (died as a child) Sir Thomas Sidney

Ancestry